THE END OF ACCEPTABLE WORDS

Chapter Soundtrack: Triumph of the Swill by Dead Kennedys 

Why do I have writer’s block?

I don’t know if I can write without getting myself into trouble. I feel like I can’t afford to take the risk I yearn to take. 

I do not want to write fiction. Fiction is safe and predictable, besides, it negates the purpose of my writing. I want to find the courage to write and share my true life story (if there is any truth in perception), authentically, without the mask of a pen name.

I feel like I’ve spent my whole life trying to protect myself from society. I believe it is smart to be conservative and reserved. I also believe those things may be the death of who I was meant to be in this lifetime.

God gave us free will, if there is a God. I believe there is a God and I am guided by purpose. 

I write, expecting to be crucified like Jesus. I chuckle to myself because I know I am not important like Jesus. Most of my fear is irrational and unnecessary. My fear is like church. It houses beliefs that may or may not be real. 

I am worried I lack the mental and emotional fortitude to recover from people mocking me—- and they will. If I write… #unacceptable #words